The Boxcar Children Tells It Like It Is…
May 6, 2008 by theleftovers
Hello, I am an English major graduating in six days and I am not planning on being a teacher. Excuza me?! Not going to be a teacher?! But that’s crazy talk. Isn’t every Liberal Arts major supposed to graduate, get a teaching job, and start wearing tacky teacher sweaters with Dr. Scholl’s orthopedic shoes?
For some reason, it has been forced into the minds of parents, half-drunk great aunts, people you meet at your family’s dinner parties, and random neighbors that the phrase “English major” is synonymous with “teacher.”
As far as I can tell, English major is still synonymous with “I can bullshit my way through life enough to get a job in anything besides math.” Unless you’re one of those universally grand English majors that’s got the full package of math skillz and english skillz. But no one cares about you. I’m talking about those Bachelor-of-Arts-because-I’m-scared-of-the-Sciences people.
You, out there! I’m telling you that you can do something other than be a teacher–besides being homeless or a stripper. In fact, if you retort back to those nosy family members that you are not going to be a teacher, but a lobbyist or librarian, you will get a slightly quizzical look in return followed by an “Ahh…” as if you had just expanded their perceptions to both accept gay marriage and stem cell research. And if you told them you were planning on being an astronaut or broadcast journalist, you will see a look on their face as if they traveled back in time to discover the world was round rather than flat. It’s that mindblowing for old people to find there are other options than teaching for a Liberal Arts major. And you can give yourself a little pat on the back for helping a family friend or grandmother expand their horizons.
If you have happened upon Liberal Arts Leftovers, you have come to a magical place full of quirky realizations and neurotic misgivings. Nancy Drew and I welcome you to our world of life after college and all that unknown shit that everyone tries to figure out about their lives. Enjoy!
-The Boxcar Children
Story of my life! I shout “hell no” to the inevitable teacher question and always get a glossy-eyed stare back. If I wanted to teach I would have gotten my degree in education, duh.